Thought

 A unwanted job....
my life was created on it....
my life is being destroyed by it....
an unknown killer....
the only way of escape from the world...
the only thing that created the world....
the only thing that must be done...
think...

       Shatters of glass

Trying 2 hold on 2 a broken dream....
the remains of a hope....
burning me....
weakening me...
strengthening me...
teaching me...
and now I must do away with it....
for the only thing that it can do....
is kill me....

                        When

When did this start
when did our dream begin.... which turned 2 a nightmare
when did our lives intertwined.... 2 become like 1
when did my eyes become blind.... not seeing reality
when did I love u...I gave u my heart
when did u love me. I know u never did
when did we set upon this dead end road...the 1 we r still on
I know when
when u walked into my life

                   Next

What’s next in my life?

What’s left to do?

I’ve already moved on....

I’ve all ready left....

I know what I want...

I’ve seen my new life...

But I have to start again....

I have to create a new path...

Watching for my mistakes...

Feelings of remembrance....

Thoughts of old...

Searching for an unseen light...

In the darkness that I call life....

             Restart

I start anew...

My life begins again....

The same feelings I long missed...

The happiness I longed for...

The joy I felt from days past....

All the bad memories of present time...

All burned away...

The light has awoken in me....

The darkness of my life has left me....

My heart beats again....

All because...

Of her....

            Unwanted

Never to be wanted....

Just a waste...

Unlooked for...

Everytime lost...

That’s what I am...

That’s what ill always be....

I’ve always been left behind...

To be chosen last...

 Who would care for me when I’m down?

Who would notice I’m gone...

I'm just staying in the shadows...

Waiting for the day when I’m finally wanted...

       Pain

Pain...

The only thing I constantly feel...

Everything in my life causes it...

Only two things in my life can cure it....

But only one I can grasp...

Memories of a troubled past...

Affecting the present....

Never letting my troubles affect any one....

Just keeping it in.

But now...

I reach for the arms of an angel...

The only escape I have from the pain...

And as I look up...

I see her face...

      Alone

I feel alone....

But then again...

I’m always am...

Tragedy helps show that your true friends are....

An apparently I only have one...

Threes no one here to comfort me...

When I’m truly down...

But I’m always there for them...

I’ve been getting this treatment for a while...

I’m used to it...

But I’m tired of this...

I can’t take it anymore...

I at. Least deserve something...

I at leas deserve comfort when I’m down...

But I know now...

Threes no one there...

            Insomnia

My thoughts are killing me....

Can’t run away from them...

Constantly bringing demons from hell....

Eating away my soul...

Always in confusion...

Never sure wets going to happen next....

Just going to be patient...

Dreams turn into nightmares...

 Joy turns into depression...

And I turn to ash...

As I fall asleep,

          The reason

Can’t take this anymore...

The eternal struggle wit reality....

Finally has taken its toll...

The days go by as I sit still....

Waiting for the world to end...

People in my life just pass me by....

Without saying a word....

Chained to my memories...

Hold me back as I try to run away...

Only her words can break these chains...

But everywhere I go...

My memories follow me...

The shadow of grief....

Has fallen upon me...

Blocking out the light from my eyes...

But as I lay in the darkness....

I begin to see the light again....

I see her face...

I see my friends...

I see everyone try and pick me up...

But I push them away...

I’m pushing them to safety...

'Cause I don’t want to hurt them...

I don’t know when my memories come back to me....

I don’t know how much pain I can endure from my past...

I don’t know who will get hurt when I snap...

That’s why I let no one know my past...

I don’t want any one to feel my pain...

I don’t want any one to get hurt...

I don’t want to hurt any one I know...

So I sacrifice my self...

For others.

           Antidote

Found my cure...

It was in front of me all along...

The answer to all my problems...

My depressions bane...

The only thing that I didn’t think of...

The only thing that I don’t want to do....

But I must do it...

To end the torment...

To set my self free....

I must go back to the beginning...

I must face my fears...

My memories...

So I ask u...

Will you stand with me?

As I tame the beast that I created...

    Why

Why....

What’s the reason...?

How come you are more interested in me?

Am I thinking right...

Or has my mind deceived me...

Have I begun to see...?

Or am I still blind...

Have I become aware of what’s happening?

Or am I just dreaming....

I’m just going to think about what’s going on...

What ever it is...

I’m always here...